Welcoming New Members

What goes through your mind when a new Christian is baptized at Fellowship? You might be excited that our church is growing (I am) or thrilled that we have more families (same here) or pleased to see that people find our church worth the process of membership. All of these responses are good in themselves, and I hope you continue to feel similar things when someone new becomes part of Fellowship Baptist Church.

But there is something more that you should think to yourself when we bring in someone new: "What can I do to make this person (or family) feel welcome and wanted at Fellowship?" There should be an appropriate weight to this question, just as those joining in our membership feel the weightiness of their own decision. Seeing someone become part of your church ought to be less like seeing another person with a Sam's Club card and realizing you shop at the same place, and more like your parents adopting a child while you still live at home. The first is merely a curiosity and the second is a change in the family. In that scenario, you wouldn't simply be amused or even pleased that your family has grown. You would feel a rush of responsibility: "What do I need to do now to make this work? How will I need to show care? What is my duty in this relationship?"

These are the kind of thoughts that should get your attention when you see people join. But enough about the mindset, what are some specific ways to follow through with this responsibility? I want to offer some suggestions. I know that these are ideal and it would be challenging to follow through with all of them. But all three of these helped my family to feel at home when we first transitioned to Fellowship.

1. Meet them after service. This takes little effort but it makes a big impact on new families. If you haven't had a change to meet someone while they are visiting, this can feel very awkward. But you can just admit that you don't know their names because you never had a chance to meet. The only way to break the ice is to start.

2. Invite people into your home. This would be quite difficult to accomplish with every new member. But you can do it with some of them. Obviously this is easier to do with more visible people who are in front of the church, which is why this happened to our family early on. But most people that join won't be up front! Work to notice everyone, especially new members, and try to bring some into your own living room.

3. If they have children, memorize their names. This is challenging for me, as many of our people know how terrible my memory is. Several people who have recently joined know I butcher their children's names all the time! But work hard at this with our new members. One of the things that really made us feel at home was the realization that at some point, most people recognized my kids and knew their names. It is hard to articulate how comforting that was, and is.

4. Have coffee. This should go without saying, because, well, coffee. I also want to point out that two women getting together or two men can be much easier than hosting the whole family for an evening.

5. Look for ways to include them in after-church plans. That could mean inviting someone along to ice cream, out to eat for Sunday lunch, or even offering to spend some time to get to know them by staying in the K Cafe. Most families are better at this than my own, and I love to watch it happen.

I hope we continue to be a welcoming church to the new families God sends our way.